Great Grandmas

Warning: The following blog was emotionally induced after watching "Kendra: Here Comes Baby" on E!

Great grandmas really are the perfect gems. I think back to my great grandma, Noodle Grandma, and I think about how lucky I am to have such fond memories of her. I've mentioned her in previous blogs, mostly about her noodle-making talent, which I've tried (and failed) to replicate. My Noodle Grandma used to knit slippers, which were great entertainment on hardwood floors...I mean, who doesn't LOVE to ice skate in the kitchen? My brother and I would "skate" for hours, oftentimes falling on our butts, but enjoying every single second of it. There was something special to her slippers- they were double stitched on the bottom-- some said it was to insure toes from poking out...Adam and I are still pretty sure she double stitched for skating purposes! I remember playing Chinese Marbles at her house-- even though I had NO idea how to do it. I remember the cookie tin, which Adam has since inherited, full of oatmeal cookies. Noodle Grandma had a collection of salt and pepper shakers, which were on full display at her viewing so that family members could each take his/her favorite set in remembrance of her.

I can't help but think of my kids' great grandma, my dear Grandma Anglin. I've mentioned her in many previous blogs, but of course the holiday season just makes me think of her even more. My kids were so lucky to have her, even for just the short time that they had with her. I am hopeful that Lilly will always have memories of her, and I'm sad that Anderson probably will not remember anything of her other than what we tell of her. Like I said, this is all surfacing after watching a pathetic reality show (which I happen to secretly love) on E! Kendra was having her first baby and her grandma, whom hates to fly, flew out to be there for the birth. Seeing Kendra's grandma holding her first great grandbaby made me think of the love my grandma had for Lilly and Anderson. There TRULY was a sparkle in Grandma's eyes when she was around Lilly. She loved that little girl more than anything in the world. And the feeling was mutual. Lilly just loved her Gigi. She wanted Gigi toast, she wanted to play dolls with Gigi, and she just loved leaning against her Gigi. And even though Lilly has never said so, I bet Lilly thought in her head about the day she would grow to be as tall as Gigi (just like we all at one time dreamed about doing)!!!

I've said it before and I'll say it again, we'll never forget Grandma. And even though Lilly might not have tons of memories of her, I know she'll always be a part of Lilly and Anderson's lives because we will see to it that they know of her.
It's hard to believe that this is our second Christmas without Grandma. It's never gotten easier, but knowing that she is exactly where she should be helps to alleviate some of the pain.

Merry Christmas to the world's best great grandmas! Without people like you the world just wouldn't be complete. I love you both tremendously and you'll forever live on in our hearts.

Tizzy Tuesday

Let me divulge into things my children threw fits about today.

5:15am- Lilly came running into my room crying because Anderson didn't stay in his bed. I can't say I blame her mini-meltdown...as I felt like crying just as badly when she came bursting into MY room at 5:15. Anderson should stay in his own damn bed..PAST 5:15am!

5:17am- Anderson was pissed because Lilly shut her bedroom door and told him to go back to bed. At this point, there was NO CHANCE of Anderson going back to bed, let alone back to sleep. (Again, my personal feelings sided with Lilly's)

5:30am- Lilly, annoyed with the ruckus in my room (from XM's The Highway), came storming in, demanding we turn down the music! Anderson and I torment her, making her cave in and join our early morning dance party!!

5:35am- Both kids fighting about who gets to potty. Anderson's little potty seat (which he tinkles in before bathtime every morning now!) is sitting near Lilly's "real potty" (the toilet!). The tantrums are completely unnecessary from the tots, as they each have their own potty. Fight is resolved as Lilly "toot toots" and both kids laugh hysterically!

5:30am- Anderson is mad that I lifted him into the bathtub. Although he CAN stradle the side of the tub and crawl in on his own, I was trying to protect his little baby man parts and reduce the risk of permanent damage to his parts.

5:32am- Lilly screams that Anderson isn't "scooted" back all the way and that his feet are touching her booty. Note to self: maybe individual baths are the way to go in the future.

5:40am- Lilly freaks out because I didn't warm up their towels in the dryer before drying them off. Note to self: Fold clothes in dryer the night before so I will never again make the mistake of giving my angel babies "cold" towels. How dare I.

6am- Kids are debating back and forth about who is the boy and who is the girl. No joke. And once Lilly convinces Anderson that SHE is the girl and HE is the boy, Anderson cries that he is a daddy. OH. MY. GOSH.

Breakfast time= food in little mouths= SILENCE. AAAAAH! (Meanwhile, Mommy has mini-meltdown in private!!!)

7:05am- Anderson plops his butt down in the doorway from the kitchen to the garage so that Lilly cannot get out to the garage and into the truck. She screams and pops him on the head. He screams and comes running to me!

And that was just the morning. Thank GOD I work for eight hours a day! I don't think my brain could take much more!!!

LET IT SNOW, LET IT SNOW, LET IT SNOW!!!

Okay so my weekend blogging skills are non-existent apparently. So, in an attempt to entertain my avid readers (thanks mom and dad!)I'll catch you up on my very pleasant weekend.

Saturday morning we woke up to snow. As a girl who typically loathes the white stuff, I surprised myself with the excitement I felt when peaking out through the blinds to see the flakes dropping in front of the street lamps. It was so pretty. A very foreign feeling overtook me. Was it cheer? Jolly? I don't know, but later that day it struck again as I blurted out to Lilly that she could get her snowsuit on and go outside to play in the snow! She looked at me, dumbfounded, as though her mom had been taken over by Mrs.Claus. "WHAT!? I can walk in the snow?!"

She went out with Aaron as he shoveled the driveway. She had SO much fun. She was so confused that she could sit in the snow and not get her booty wet! She looked like she was skating on ice, like she had never walked in the snow!

As I finally convinced her to come back inside, about thirty minutes later, I was brought back to my memories of playing in the snow as a small tot...peeing in my snowsuit because I didn't want to quit playing long enough to take a bathroom break (not to mention the instant warm-up it brought!), running inside and putting our mittens, hats, scarves, and red little hands on the radiators at mom's house, and then running upstairs to change into jammies in hopes of getting the chill off our tiny little bones! It's been such a blessing to be making new memories with my kids. I can't WAIT until this weekend when we get to mom's house and break out the "ancient" sleds that my siblings and I used to use...to be able to pass them on to Lilly and Anderson will just bring a little extra jolly to my already merry season!!!

..but if you'd just LISTEN...

Control freak: : "a derogatory term for a person who attempts to dictate how everything around them is done. It can also refer to someone with a limited number of things that they want done a specific way." Uh huh? And?

Here's the thing. I've been told I'm a "control freak" many times. Some see it as me trying to control the PERSON, but in reality, I'm only trying to intervene on stupidity. There is a right way and a wrong way to do things. It's not my fault that I USUALLY know the right way to do things. You could call it a curse. Honestly. I usually know the easiest, most efficient way to do something. And when I see him...errrr someone, doing it the long complicated way, it frustrates me..mostly because I'm going to have to hear about it later ("Ugh, you have NO idea how long that took me." "Ugh, you have NO idea what I went through to get there.")but also because it's annoying to see such absurdity. Just listen to me and it's be SOOO simple.

Let me give you just one example of this ignorance:
Keys. How does one lose keys? You know you had to use them to GET to work. And you're pretty much guaranteed to need them to get home from work. These keys would be on my top three list of important things to keep contact with. So I ask you, how does one LOSE keys that have been in one's pocket all evening? Could they perhaps have fallen out of that gaping hole in one's back pocket that said genius warned one about? Heavens no. Surely not.

Control freak I may be. But it's not for manipulation purposes, but rather for reasons of simplicity. If you'd JUST LISTEN you'd see that my way is much easier and much better. End of story.

Things I Am Not

1)I'm not evil. Or at least it's not my intention.

2)I'm not selfish, bitter, or jealous...of anyone.

3)I'm not ashamed of my job, my family, my house, or my "things"..because they are just that-- things.

4)I'm not your slave. So stop acting as though I am.

5)I'm not passive-aggressive. You will know when something you've said or done has upset me.

6)I'm not one to feel entitled to anything.

7)I'm not egotistical. I am grounded enough to see those around me.

8)I'm not superficial.

9)I'm not your doormat. Do not treat me as one.

10)I'm not weak. Your hatred and negativity will not bring me down.

I sit here and write all these things because today I let someone get the better part of my emotions-- something that doesn't happen that often. I let someone make me feel so degraded and lowly today. I let someone talk to me in a way that I never would typically let someone get away with. It was disgusting. I realized something though...the things this person said to make me feel as low as I did, actually helped me. At the end of the day, I still have my pride and my morals. I don't have that sense of entitlement that she does. I don't have to walk around with that enormous chip on my shoulder like she does. I can walk with a bounce to my step knowing that I am a GOOD person. I'm a DECENT person who treats people with respect and dignity. I am a nice, giving, prideful, independent, strong, respectable woman. And I can go to bed at night knowing that I haven't hurt anyone's feelings or caused anyone to question their role in this world. And that's a beautiful feeling.

"Lilly, it's for you.."

Ever since the kids started going to school, my most favorite thing has been watching them make friends! I LOVE seeing them interact with the other little tots in their classrooms. For Anderson, it's Brylee and Megan (what can I say? He's a ladies man!). In Lilly's class, there are a group of about three or four girls who are always together everytime I drop her off or pick her up. It's adorable. I've watched through the hallway window at the way she walks into the classroom only to be greeted by the group of girls! They all come running to her screaming "LILLY! LILLY!" (I'm seriously not exaggerating!)

Today I walked into Lilly's classroom. Lilly, Lois, Samantha, Kassidy, and Hailey were all sitting at the first table, coloring with markers. As soon as they see me they say "Lilly, your mom is here." Then Lilly and Samantha come running up to me and Lilly asks if Samantha can come over to her house. UMMMMM? "Well, Samantha would have to ask her mom if she can come over. She can't come home with us tonight." Both girls looked defeated, like I just broke the worst possible news to them! Lilly just kept saying "Mom, can she come over tonight? Can she come over tomorrow? If her mom says yes can she come over?" Then, cute little Kassidy says "Samantha, you can come to MY house." OOOOOOOOOOOOOOH NO SHE DI'ENT! LOL! Convinced that I was bound to get the worst-mom-of-the-year award (at least in Lilly's eyes!), I left a note for Samantha's mom to call me.

Tonight while I was on the phone with my friend Rachael, I got another call-- I didn't recognize the number, other than it was a local FTW number. So I answered it. It was Samantha's mom asking if Lilly could talk on the phone to Samantha! "LILLY, IT'S FOR YOU!" Lilly was sooo excited! She couldn't believe that she was getting a call from her friend! It was the most ADORABLE thing! They talked for about five minutes. It's funny how little girls just seem born with the ability to chat with their girlfriends about nothing!

As adorable as the whole thing was...it reminds me that my little girl is growing up. Sure she's only three years old, but she has friends...little adorable friends! It's SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO stinkin cute, but it's just the first sign that my little lady has friends other than her mama!!!

A Letter To The Enemy

Dear Illness,

Well, it looks as though you are planning to stick around in my body for awhile. And while I'd like to say your visit is welcomed, it is not. It's not enough that you've violated me, you've also managed to infest my poor children and my brother. We've had enough of your contamination. Leave us be.
My throat hurts worse than the aftermath of childbirth. My nose is clogged worse than my shower drain. And your existence is leaving my entire body aching. Go away.
What would your mother think, you harming a nice young lady and her family? Your interruption to my life is much like Kanye's interference in dear Taylor's acceptance speech. Annoying and unnecessary.
Have you no cooth? Why me? Why must you pollute my pure (eeehhh) body?

I have come up with a solution. You will pay me rent. For every day you stick around, you will deduct at least two pounds of my body fat. If you fail to do so, I will begin the vitamin c regiments immediately. There will be no grace period. I will start taking back control of my body. That's right, even if it means I have to work out, drink water, and take vitamins...I'll do it, Disease. You will no longer live off my healthy parts.

Please know that by resuming residency in my body you accept all responsibilities of the aforementioned agreement.


Angry, upset, and over it,
Gretchen

Mission Failed.

Well I already blew the daily blogging. I know what you're thinking, "failure." I have no excuse for my lack of posting for Friday other than I was just not in the mood to write. When I started reflecting on my day Friday, I thought about how I'd rather not relive it. After a "come-to-Jesus" meeting at work, fighting the crazy Fort Waynian drivers at the four o'clock hour, and then spilling an entire 44oz diet coke on my lap while out at dinner with the family, I decided an early bedtime was in order. Thus, no blog.

Saturday morning was spectacular around here. My kids actually slept until 6am, giving me thirty minutes to myself, in which I showered without any toddlers watching, made my bed (first time in over a week), and straightened the chaos on my bedroom floor (by throwing every item of clothing, even if clean, into the laundry basket). Soon after my thirty minute me-time, the kids woke up excited to get their stuff packed up for a day with Grandpa! I barely had a voice Saturday morning so when the kids decided to turn on each other (Anderson winning, as always), I didn't even try to talk over them to break it up. I found that staying out of their battles actually ended up helping them come to a resolution sooner. Odd. Then I had the kids go through the spare bedroom closet where I had been "storing" their old toys, to pick out things they wanted to donate to Santa's Workshop in Wabash.(Lilly seemed to grasp the concept. Anderson just liked throwing toys into boxes!) Then we headed to Wabash so I could drop the kids off to my dad while I went to Kokomo with my aunts to shop for our adopted family!

The shopping was chaos, as is to be expected two weeks before Christmas. Our family put in $325 to go towards our adopted family. We planned to get each child two outfits and two toys. We also wanted to be sure to get the mom something too. Six hours later (seriously) we had accomplished our goal!!! We had SO much fun shopping for the family. It was a good feeling to know that we were getting the family things that they might not have otherwise had.

WHOOPS!!

Mom-of-the-Year-Award alert! I lost my kid this morning. Well I mean, I KNEW he was in the house somewhere (or at least I was pretty sure), but I couldn't find the little stinker. He was in Lilly's room "cooking" and then all of a sudden he was gone! I kept hearing his little laugh, the ornery laugh that let's me know he's up to something sneaky. I followed his devious clatter and ended up in my bathroom...and there he was...on the second shelf of my linen closet! He was the most content critter, laying on those towels like a cat perched on a windowsill! He's quite the cheese! I cannot believe he'll be two at the end of the month. He's really starting to come into his own little baby skin, hehe! He's HILARIOUS!

Hodgepodge

1) Fort Wayne apparently has the most satisfied renters, according to a website apartmentratings.com. Oddly enough when breaking the story, WANE.COM posted pictures of my old apartment complex, Preston Pointe..you know, the one I blogged about last year complaining about a nearby meth lab. Lovely. Just goes to show how desparate Fort Wayners are. As I drove home today...and by drove I mean blew, I thought about how breezy my old apartment was. It was so bad we had to hang old comforters over the doorways and windows to keep the wind from blowing the blinds around! It was horrible. It makes me grateful to have been able to move into my house, keep my house even this summer when Aaron was gone, and give my kids more space (and warmth) than where we had been living!

2) I'm so tired of hearing people complain about the weather. Students call on an hourly basis, trying to find out if we're going to close campus early. It's WIND people! Sadly, it's only December 9th. What are these folks going to do when winter REALLY sets in? Oy!

3) This fireplace in my living room is really drying out my throat. No more fires :(

4) Tonight is the season finale of Glee. Can you say "SECTIONALS!!!"

5) Why are people NOT working? I mean, I KNOW the economy is HORRIBLE, but it's Christmas season--- EVERY retail store is hiring. GO WORK! UGH! I'm just so tired of hearing about how people don't want to go work because they don't want to lose their unemployment. I guess I just don't understand.

6) Been trying to think of a Christmas (or Christmas eve) tradition to start with the kids. I'll buy new Christmas jammies for them to open on Christmas eve, but other than that....any ideas?

Tuesday Tuesday

I have no temper tantrums to throw.
No ghastly weather to write of.
I'm without complaints of my sassy daughter.
And have ignored my husband's horrible chewing mannerisms.

I have had a very boring Tuesday. Thankfully.

I encourage you to watch the Carrie Underwood Holiday Special on FOX (I'm sure you can find it online, if you missed it yesterday). Quite entertaining, and a very moving song at the end. I've attached the same song, performed at the CNN Heroes awards show.


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First Snow

Today was the first snowfall we've had this year. Yes, it was a disaster. There were a number of accidents before I even left for work at 7am, including a ten car pile-up on 69, a car versus school bus collision two miles from my house, and countless other slide-offs. Needless to say, I was petrified before I even left my houes this morning!
Convinced that I could make the drive to the north side of town if I just gave myself a few extra minutes, I left the house twenty five minutes earlier than usual...equipped with two blankets, a flashlight, a bottle of water (it's all I had!), and extra mittens and hats for the kids...you know, just in case we got into an accident. Laugh all you want, but I was preparing for the worst. I was still scared to death before I pulled out of the driveway. I told Lilly that we needed to say a little prayer. The kids both folded their little hands and prayed with me that God would keep us safe on the way to school and give Mommy the strength and courage to make the drive. It was precious. My right leg was shaking as I pulled out of my addition and made my way onto 24. And to answer your question...yes I was that person driving 25 mph on 24 and 69! DO NOT HONK at me or look at me with such disgust. I was trying to get my babies to school safely!

Just remember people, take your time. Your job will wait. Your children CAN go to school late. And that coffee will still be there waiting for you at Starbuck's...SO SLOW YOUR ASS DOWN AND DRIVE RESPONSIBLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (And STOP honking at me!)

Advent Conspiracy

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My church is doing a series called the "advent conspiracy" in which they challenge us to think about our own spending this holiday season. What if we really did what this video suggests? We have been so concerned about spending the "right" amount on each person, that we forget to think about what's really important. Does your sister REALLY need that new iPod Nano? Does your husband REALLY need that 52" plasma TV? Do YOU really need to spend hundreds, if not thousands, on your children? What are we teaching our kids?
I'm really proud of my family this year. We've always done a gift exchange on my dad's side of the family, but this year after deciding that we don't really "need" anything, we've instead decided to adopt a local family who is struggling to afford a Christmas. The single mom has been out of work for over a year and has three little girls. The mom had to make the decision to pay for the electric bill rather than buying her little girls Christmas presents. I'm not sure the background information on the mom's situation. It seems hard to imagine not being able to find a job two years later, but...that's her situation and regardless of her story, she still has three little ladies who deserve to have a Christmas.
I picked up on a really neat message at church today because it has become highly applicable to a situation I'm going through at home. The message says "your plenty will supply their need...so that in turn, their plenty will supply what you need." Basically, I have enough. My kids have everything they NEED. Sure there might be things we WANT, but we have what we NEED. There are people in our community who can't say the same thing, and that's unfortunate. We've become used to our "American Entitlement" that suggests 'I work hard for my money therefore it belongs to ME ME ME.' It's terrible. What if we gave some of our "plenty" to those who truly have the need for it? When they thank God for the gifts we gave them, it will hopefully fill our hearts with what we needed. Our need isn't physical. It's not "things." Unfortunately for many of us, our "need" is more GOD in our life and in our heart. Maybe by helping someone else, it will fulfill our need.
I hope that this video makes you think a little about what would happen if we stopped spending so much on ourselves, and instead spent a little on those in need.

"When I Get That Old"

Today is my big brother's 30th birthday. WOOOOOOOT WOOOOOOT! I've been reflecting today on some of the good times I've had with my brother through the years, but there are two stories that I just can't seem to shake. My brother and I used to despise each other! After reading these, maybe you can see why!!!!!

-When I was about ten years old (maybe?) my brother insisted that I was adopted. I remember it like it was yesterday. We were standing on the hill in front of my mom's house. I'm sure we had been arguing about something to make him initiate this brutal conversation, but he looked at me and said "you know you're adopted anyway, right?" WHAT?! NO WAY. NO I'M NOT! "Yeah. Your mom's real name is Louise Hill. How do you think you got your middle name? Mom and Dad always just told you that you were named after our great aunt Louise, but that's not true." CAN YOU BELIEVE HIM?

-My family used to take vacations to Wyoming. On one of our few trips to Yellowstone, my parents apparently took a picture of a buffalo. I vaguely remember our trips, but this picture stuck around in my mom's picture drawer for many years. On the back of the picture, my brother had written "Gretchen 1989" CAN YOU BELIEVE HIM??

LOL! All mean-spirited stories aside, my brother is my best friend. He met Gary around the same time that I met Aaron. We became very close around the time that I got pregnant with Lilly. Now we talk almost EVERYDAY, usually more than once! He's incredible and I'm SO lucky to be such good friends with my brother!

Adam, I hope you enjoy your 30th! I wish I could be there tonight to help celebrate! I love you and I hope the next thirty years are nothing but pure bliss and excitement for you! You deserve it! I LOVE YOU!

You tell the truth

We've all told lies. It's inevitable. Some justify lying by saying they do it to protect the ones they love. Others are just habitual liars who truly believe their own lies. And then there are those pretentious fibbers who lie to make themselves look better. It's THOSE people who's lives stink sooo much that they have to fabricate stories to hold people's interest. We've all heard the stories from a guy who wrestled an alligator to save a family of four from being eaten. Or the story of the girl who has the most incredible husband who rubs her back every night without expecting "more".....rrrrrrrright! As if HE exists! HA!



I'm not exempt from the tall tales-telling. I've done my share of double-dealing. BUT, in my older years (I'm almost 28, after all!) I'm finding that my real story is good enough. There really is NO need to formulate my own version of reality. My life isn't roses. My kids aren't perfect. My job isn't without flaws. My boyfriend doesn't really think the sun shines from my ass (although he IS mistaken!). My life just isn't perfect. And I really have no need to make it appear as though I have it all together. I don't. And anyone who claims to have all the answers is the biggest frickin' liar of 'em all!

Santa Who?

My kids don't seem to have the first clue who Santa is. Lilly is convinced that Santa couldn't possibly come down the chimney and out of the fireplace because "daddy said you can't open the fireplace!" Of course they recognize him, but they have no idea what he represents, or what Santa can do for them! This poses a problem for Aaron and me because we can't threaten that Santa is watching the temper tantrum that Anderson is throwing, or watching Lilly pinching her little brother's tiny arm. I heard my cousin mention that she tells her little girl that Santa knows if she's good or bad, which helps prompt her little lady to behave! I tried it with Lilly tonight. It went something like this:

me: Lilly, Santa doesn't like it when you tell mommy no.
Lilly: Yes he does.

me: Santa watches you and Bubbs to make sure you're using manners and being polite.

Lilly: I use manners. I said no pleeeeease.

me: That's not what I mean Lilly.

Lilly: Not what I mean Lilly pleeeeeease.

me: RUDE!

Lilly: Rude pleeeeeeeeeeeeease.

me: LILLY!!!!

Lilly: Lilly pleeeeeeeeeeeeease. (followed by hysterical laughing, by both of us!)

I am defeated!

A friend from work invited the kids to go see Santa this weekend at her church. I'm worried that the kids will flip out at the sight of a shapely man in a red suit! We'll see how it goes. Wish us luck!

Keep Your Own Shit and Eat Worms

We've all heard the saying "the grass ain't always greener on the other side." After talking to my dear friend today, I got some closure on things that have been stirring up my emotions and confusing the crud out of my mind.

Me: I just feel like there's something MORE out there.

Megan: Everyone thinks the grass is greener on the other side.

Me: Exactly.

Megan: But then you get there and find that the grass is just as brown..with poop in it...and worms!
Me: So what you're saying is I should stick with my own shit and worms?

Megan: Yep, that's what I'm saying!

After polling many of my close, married friends, I'm finding that I'm not alone in the "is this IT" feeling I've been having lately. I've polled newlyweds, engaged couples, and a couple who have been married for well over ten years...and they all say the same things...there are days we all feel like there has to be something more. There are days where the monotony overwhelms us and we want to break free, but...we try to look at the big picture and realize that there's NO ONE who could replace the loves of our lives!!!

I found out yesterday that I am interviewing with the head of financial aid at Ross. This would be a "promotion" for me and the possibility of personal growth in the company, which is what interested me so much at Ross to begin with. I LOVE the job that I do now. I LOVE that I interact with the students as much as I do. I LOVE seeing the students every morning and telling them goodbye at the end of everyday. I LOVE answering the phone with my postive enthusiasm everyday. I LOVE that I'm the "go-to" person. I love that I'm the person people look to for answers. I LOVE my job. I'm a little worried that I might be looking to the other side of the fence for "greener grass." The financial aid job requires that I work at least one night until 8. It will be MUCH more work than what I take on now. I just fear that I'm looking at the other side of the fence thinking that I need something more. The money will be nice....but will I truly be happy? Should I just stick with my own shit and eat worms?

TEMPER TANTRUM TUESDAY

Some things that really yanked my chain today (what does that even MEAN?!):

1) The shower head pointing to the opposite end of the shower when I got in. Why is this necessary? You are not that tall. There is no need to point it UP. Ugh.

2) Walking in to work only to find a stack of things on my desk that clearly have been misplaced, as my desk is not "home" to these items. Ugh.

3) Laundry being folded incorrectly. REALLY? Why do my jeans need to be folded as origami art? And why are all the pants not folded and stacked together, followed by tees, tanks, and then socks and panties? I'm forced to restack the clothes for fear that I'll walk out of the house with a pair of panties stuck up the leg of my pants. It's unecessary.

4) Why can I hear you chewing? And swallowing?

5) Naps at 7pm. Why?

6) My daughter crying for nachos and telling me I'm "not her friend" because I served pasta.

7) "Boiler up" (insert eye roll)

8) Payday being less than 24 hours ago...and my ENTIRE check being gone. Thirty days until the next payday. Oy.

9) This nagging feeling that there's something more...something I'm missing. Will it go away or must I first find it? Ah, the pressure.

10) The neighborhood shrine. You drive into my addition, mistaking it for an airport runway, and come upon the only dark house in the neighborhood. That's mine!