Beautiful Disaster

I'm a mess. I'm nothing and have nothing: make something of me! You can do it; you've got what it takes God. Psalm 40:17 (Msg)

Jesus warned us that we’d have problems in the world. No one is immune to pain or insulated from suffering, and no one gets to skate through life problem-free. Life is a series of problems. Every time you solve one, another one is waiting to take its place.

Your most profound and intimate experiences of worship will likely be in your darkest days -- when your heart is broken, when you feel abandoned, when you’re out of options, when the pain is great, and you turn to God alone. It is during suffering that we learn to pray our most authentic, heart-felt, honest-to-God prayers. When in pain, we don’t have the energy for superficial prayers.

Joni Eareckson Tada notes, “When life is rosy, we may slide by with knowing about Jesus, with imitating him and quoting him and speaking of him. But only in suffering will we know Jesus.” We learn things about God in suffering that we can’t learn any other way.

Problems force us to look to God and depend on him instead of ourselves. Paul testified to this benefit: “We felt we were doomed to die and saw how powerless we were to help ourselves; but that was good, for then we put everything into the hands of God, who alone could save us ….” (2 Corinthians 1:9 LB) You’ll never know that God is all you need until God is all you’ve got.

*from Daily Hope with Rick Warren 4/25

If only it was this easy...

I just wish my kids had had more time with my grandma. Wouldn't it be nice if we really could just visit heaven for a day?

(Don't) Dump Here

Do you ever feel like you're just a dumping ground for everyone's crap? Sometimes I feel as though I'm TOO approachable and people confide in me TOO much. Sometimes I'd like to stop people, mid-complaint, and explain to them that I have my own "shit" and I don't need to take on theirs also. Of course, I won't do that, but it'd be great sometimes!

Yesterday the tables flipped and I "dumped" on my friend JW. I have really been struggling with some things and I just needed to shoot JW an email and ask him to pray for me, to guide me, and more importantly have him tell me that it was all going to work out fine! After back-and-forth emailing for a majority of the morning, I got the guidance that I needed. Basically, I needed to suck it up, quit whining, and move on! Ha!

Sometimes it's nice to have someone that you can go to with your issues...Someone who knows you're a bit nutty and loves you anyway. Sometimes it's nice to have a friend to not sugarcoat things and just give you the tough love that you NEED.

I was taking a "friend inventory" this morning and I just realize that I have the BEST support system in the whole world. I have the BEST family and friends that anyone could ever hope for.

All My Fountains

It was a very trying weekend, not for any extraordinary reasons, but rather just one of those "ugh" weekends! The kids wouldn't listen, the weather kinda stunk, and my motivation was nowhere to be found. Right before we left for church Sunday morning, Lilly spilled a glass of milk all over herself and onto the floor. Anderson then blindly walked into the puddle with his sock-covered feet...and well it just went on from there. Needless to say, I debated whether or not to proceed with the morning's plans of praise and worship at my "happy place" or just get back into jammies and start the day completely over. I pushed through my mini-mom-meltdown and the kids and I headed to church! The kids stayed with me during the service rather than going to their Sunday school classes. The song below is one that they lead during worship that morning. I instantly fell in love with it! I think it was just exactly the high energy, positive message that I needed at that point!

Ready?

The worst thing about being jaded by an old relationship is the reprecussions it has on your future relationships. At what point do we allow ourselves to let go of past resentments and choose to put our trust in someone new? And even if we are willing to be open to the idea of letting down our walls, just how far down do we let those walls? Are we knowingly setting ourselves up for failure by only partially letting down our guard? Or are we welcoming disappointment if we are completely open?

Stupid Ass

As I walked out to the playground yesterday to pick up my pretty princess, I heard "Lilly, come up here and talk to me about what happened." I noticed my princess crying on the playground below, and quickly rushed to the teacher to find out what was going on. She said "Well, one of the kindergartners said that Lilly called her a stupid ass." Imagine my shock, not necessarily that my daughter would say such vulgarity, but rather that she'd say it at school! I'm not suggesting that my precious toddler uses such slander at home, but I have heard some of the mean things she's said to her brother, so the idea that she was capable of such language didn't come as a complete shocker to me. The teacher asked if I thought this was possible of Lilly, because she "always seems so polite. I can't imagine that she'd ever say something like that." To which I replied, "Let me talk to her, she'll tell me the truth."

Me: "Lilly, did you call Sophia a bad name?"
Lilly: "Yes."
Me: "What did you call her?"
Lilly: "Stupid."
Me: "Lilly, did you say another bad word after that?"
Lilly (with tears): "Yes. I said ass."
Me: "Lilly, why would you call her that?"
Lilly: "Well, she IS."
Me (red with rage): "You apologize to her right now and we'll talk about this at home."

Lilly quickly apologized to little Sophia, and cried the rest of the way to the car. Knowing that she was in big trouble, Lilly politely offered to help Anderson with his car door, his seat belt, and offered him her pink laptop that was in the car. (All things she never does!) I stood outside the car, called my mom and asked her how to handle this?! This isn't something my kids do! They've been in trouble at school MAYBE twice, but NOTHING like THIS! I was mortified.

I handled the situation the best way I knew how at the time. I made her stand in the corner until dinner (nose in the corner, hands behind her back, not a peep), she had to write an apology letter, and then she had to call her dad and tell him what happened. Aaron, being 45984 miles away, handled it very well. He spoke very calmly, explained to her that it hurts people's feelings when we call them bad names, and told her that he hoped she wouldn't ever do something like that again.

I am hopeful that today will be a better day for my little Lilly.

(...to be continued...)

And my handsome man....

I couldn't leave out my precious little man! Here are some of my favorite pictures of my Andyman!

Taking a trip...

I've been going through some old pictures and came across some of my most favorite pictures of the Lilly. I remember all of these pictures, when they were taken, what we were doing, etc... I am ridiculously smitten with my babies! They are my world, and I am so blessed to have such beautiful, wonderful, happy, and healthy kids! I love looking at old pictures and taking a trip down memory lane.

Things that make me happy...

My handsome son, in a tie!



Everyone needs two great uncles!




How cute are her piggies?!




Summers, learning to ride bikes!




Memories of happier times...family days!




Daddy making funny faces at my baby boy!