Almost two years ago I read a (hilarious) book called "Marry Him: The Case for Settling for Mr.Good Enough." In writing the title of that book, I realize two things. First, how ridiculously pathetic it sounds that I own, read, and loved said book. And secondly, all this time I thought the book was called "Marry Him: The case OF Settling for Mr. Good Enough." Hmmmm.
I think we spend a lot of time focusing on all the wrong things. For over six months I have had a vision of who JM was in my mind. How he treated me, the things he did for me, how the kids felt about him, the way he fit into my family...I focused on those things ONLY. I failed to remember the reality of things-- his inability to manage money, his lack of motivation to try anything new, his childish habits with his friends, etc. Those were the constant issues in our relationship that I could never let go of when we were together, but easily dismissed them when we broke up and I was pining for his attention! Of course I don't intend to downplay the relationship that I had with JM because honestly the guy changed my life forever, but I think I have carried on this false legacy of him long enough. Who he was when we were together, and who he was before and after "us" are two different people. I'm not saying one is better than the other, I'm just saying that it seems as though there are two different people.
When I finally was able to step back from the situation with JM and go on a few dates, one of the first things someone said to me was "Never settle. You deserve more than to settle." Perhaps I did settle. My friend Rachael told me that I can never accept anyone into my life who is less than amazing. She's right! I'm ready to look forward and be the girl who never looks back.
No comments:
Post a Comment