Sunny Days Are Ahead

I have said a thousand times over that I feel like we go through things in life to teach us a lesson...not that God is punishing us and making us "learn our lesson" but rather to go through things and learn from them and react in a way that is honoring to Him. I also believe that sometimes we are used as examples to other people. That we go through situations and that, even if we don't learn from our situation, that someone else may be watching and learning from us. I know that I've failed at this so many times. I know that I've questioned situations a lot. I also know that it's all coming full circle in my life now.
I oftentimes wonder why I had two children with a person who was a drug addict. How did that happen to me? I would question God..."God why would you put me in a relationship with someone so abusive and sick?" Looking back, I guess I got mad at God for that. I remember though, going to the Family Program at the treatment center in MN that Aaron was at. I remember meeting a man who Aaron took to pretty much right away. "Karl with a K" he would say. Karl with a K was a bit older than Aaron...he had kids Aaron's age, in fact. But for whatever reason, Karl took Aaron under his wing and during my weekend at the treatment center I got the chance to learn a lot about Karl. I just remember thinking "Shut up! We have SO much in common!" And whether or not that was true, it just showed me that God put people in my life at that time that I could relate to. Karl became a friend. I thought about him often when I came back home. In fact, after both Aaron and Karl got out of treatment, Karl hired Aaron to come work for him. When my kids would go to MN to visit Aaron, Karl would hang out with my kids. The kids called him Uncle Karl! To this day I am thankful for the opportunity to meet him...even if it was at a drug and alcohol treatment center!
My point with that story is that I truly believe each person comes into our life for a reason. And I believe that each situation serves a lesson. My life with Aaron seems like a hundred years ago. And although I have few good memories of my years with him, I know that I went through it all with him for a reason. I have had so many close friends struggle with a loved one's addiction. I have heard stories of other girls who are in a seemingly hopeless relationship. I know that each of them have to find their own way, but it hurts my guts to know what they're going through. I want to fast forward life for each of them and show them that it will get better. They will find their way out of this exhausting roller coaster and they will look back and wonder why they wasted so many tears. It seems that so many addicts have the same story. I have seen this with the two addicts in my own life. I see the disappointment that my own dad has caused and I've seen the damage Aaron has done too. It would be impossible to ignore the similarities between the two. My prayer is that my story can be a motivational one for other people. It is possible to go on. That first year without Aaron was the hardest time of my life, but I look at where I am now and I know that I'm only "here" because of what I went through then. I learned things about myself that I never knew existed. I humbled myself in ways that I never imagined having to do. I did it all because I had no other choice. I had two tiny little babies depending on me and counting on me to keep it together. And although there were dark days, we made it through and the sun is now shining brighter than ever before.